A Renactment

Actual email sent to an ex-roomie/chick who got me in at this company, minus all the SmileyCental shaking angry dudes that probably gave my computer a virus but that are too pefect with their little red faces to leave out: {and Blogger won't let me put in the pic I want to add here as a substitute}

** fair warning, I am about to spontaniously combust, so if the email is incomplete, call the fire department**

So I walk in on time and glad to be, ready to see if Miss Menthol decided to show up today, ready to plan a week of fake smiles and earphones, maybe catch the super cutie with the corner office and chat about his latest jaunt around the country...
And I get an email from my boss asking if I'd done my timecard yet (we had a whole thing a few weeks back about the timing of it all so I don't get behind in paychecks again) and after verifying I replied "Sure did!" (wondering why she didn't just check to see if there was anything to approve). So she calls me and says "I see your time card but I want you to change it. I remember seeing you with your purse that one day at 9:30am and this other day your lunch was too long."

OKOKOKOKOK.

I reply calmly "I didn't know I did that, but since you have the days and memory of it, I'll go change it."
So she starts in with "it was that day you wore that really cute skirt... and then this other day [my friend who's cube wall you share who works with both of us] couldn't find you at lunch time so you were gone for two hours. I just want that to be reflected in your time sheet."

This is where I wish I had that air spout they talk about blondes wearing ponytails to hide... to let the steam out.
I am trying to recall what she is talking about!!!!!!
It dawns on me, and I explain "your right. There was a day I didn't get back to my desk until 9:30am because I started my period on the way to work and had to go clean up the mess I'd made and you saw me going BACK to my desk."
"Oh, well, but..."
"And now that the recycled office supplies are on the other side of campus (four blocks away) and I am helping [cool chick who shares my other cube wall who just got promoted over my managers head] move her office I am over there three times a week looking for stuff and its no longer just a stop in for three minutes - they have construction on the street after the security guy writes up a temp. parking permit for me to look for TACKS so that is now a 20 minute job - if I don't see any hope of finding it. If there is a stack of newly dropped off boxes, I get to get into them head first for half an hour, looking for TACKS. Before I come to my desk and have to special order them for her. You know, kinda like those little clippy things you asked me for two weeks ago? That was 45 minutes away from my desk. So, Manager, I understand that I have been very poor at writing myself out of the office on the white board, but I didn't try to mess with my time card over it."
Her, a bit sheepishly; "well, if it was for work thats fine, but when we are really busy, and people are looking for you, the first person they come to is me - so we need to know when your at lunch and when you're across campus and and and and and..."

So, I didn't change my timecard.
I am terribly upset that she thinks I was cheating her out of time.
I am enraged that there was a day in December when she didn't come to work (without thinking to tell me) and I went home sick (after waiting for three hours for her to reply to me and tell me its ok) and no one would have known the difference if I'd have just stayed home at lunch but I clocked myself short 4 hours anyway.
Most of all, I hate starting a day with "you liar!! I caught you and I wasn't gonna say anything until you tried to push this past me but your a liar!!"
Oh, and it was all I could do not to mention that this really busy week she is talking about?? I didn't SEE HER, get an email from her, hear her voice, or get a voicemail from her for 2.75 days. Yep, she needs me SO often that I can go for day after day after day without knowing she exists.

Yep, looking for a new job as I finish this up.
So much for "come and go as I please".
I will literally be writing out on the white board every time I leave my desk - in case she thinks I take too long at the bathroom one day.
And remember the days when I would walk in and be at her desk at 9am with a stack of questions?
And not leave the building until 10pm because I was so into my job?
Eating lunch at my desk because I was so into getting the work done and wanting to be the bestest little temp she ever did see?

F*ck that.
I've dumped best friends for making me feel half as low, half as remedial, half as misjudged, HALF as ready to rip my toenails out one at a time because it would hurt less than being told you have no morality - and those were people I liked to start with.

Having just learned I am at an will employee, it is all I can do to stay here right this minute.
I can buy dog food if I take a pay cut.
And only be yelled at by customers who don't know me from the next receptionist - not people I'm supposed to respect.

-- My ex-roomie's reply:
WOW. That was such an explosive rant I am kinda scared to say anything!!!

To add insult to injury, I got a loving call from my home business recruiter letting me know how well her business is going and that the promotion to the next step she has been working toward is on the wire... and how grateful she was that I have been such a support in her business and her personal life... and how relatively easy its been to get a complimentary car payment reimbursement from the company on top of commission checks and a 'raise' for all the work shes put in to get promoted... and where the training for all this was on the website.

So I get reamed first thing on a Monday morning by my glass ceilinged Cubeville stab my eyes out with pencils lameass job and then get a call from a close friend who wants to share her joy in life that her job is so rewarding.
I nearly cried when she asked how my day was going.
In front of the building.

I haven't done one work project all day!! Its nearly 1pm!!!! OK, so I emptied the fax tray into the inboxes, and got some email, and answered my phone three times. But I haven't DONE anything that would be part of my job description but the fax thing (exciting, I told you!!). I think 4 hours might be a new record... usually I sneak in a 20 minute break from blog reading and job searching somewhere in there!!

How is your day going?