Wednesday, February 15, 2006

Its All Happening

I got a call for an interview.
I called the number back and it was disconnected an hour after the message was left on my VM, but I got a call for an interview!!!
I'm a little miffed that I can't get a hold of this broad who calls at 4:45pm to say "I'm interested in talking about your resume with you; tomorrow in your town would be a good time, so call me back."
So I figure its a little test... you know, like the "if they got a manicure and are comfortable with eye contact then they've just won 80% of the battle" kinda test. I'm cool with that... weed out the weak, skim the pool, filter the fucktards. Good job LaKeisha.
I sent an email through the website she found me on. I showed interest in getting together with her as she'd asked, reminded her I am currently employed and need a TINY bit of notice for an interview, and reitterated my contact info for her convenience.
I got a call for an interview folks!!!! Yipee!!

So, I had PLANNED on having the whole 18 square feet of cube to myself today because Miss Menthol told me as she left yesterday that she was too PMSy and wouldn't be coming in today.
Do a little dance with me ya'll!!!
I come in and there she is... wet hair, sweat pants, flip flops, and all "morning dear, how are you?"
"I'm good. What are you DOING here?"
"Well, the only way I could be more comfortable is if I take my bra off ::wheeze hack cough:: and with my manager off today for her birthday and my mini-me having her last day today, I thought I'd be here. But see, I'm all dressed like I'm home on the couch!!"
"uh huh. and you can leave at lunch if you feel like it?"
"I can leave whenever I want!! But see, there is some stuff I can do here, so I want to be here in case something happens."
"umm... your boss is gone and your shadow is packing to move to her new desk and yesterday you were bored for 6 hours and TODAY you have stuff to do and something might happen? Ok, well, my phone is ringing so I'm gonna go take this call..." you life sucking, black cloud sharing Hefer who blocks me into my grey corner and hords my working desk space!!! Go on another smoke break Wheezy and be sure to bring back some carby fat loaded something from the deli to shove in my face when you don't like it and don't forget your cup of crunchy fuckin veggies to knaw on for the next three hours on your way back...

So I go around the corner to take a call from a number I didn't recognize. I know everyone can hear me, but I don't know whose calling and there is a congregation of 6 at the corner of hell-whole-alley and get-me-to-sunshine. When I realize its a recruiter for ANOTHER management trainee application I'd submitted, I BOWL OVER the little pow wow and try not to flat out run to the outside doors. With one deep breath I say "good morning, I'm sorry to keep you waiting but I'm at the office and the reception in the building is terrible... you were saying something about an interview on Tuesday?" A very friendly James gave me the digs on when and where and with whom I will have my one hour sit down. My pen is scribbling the shit out of this postit while he rambles this stuff off like its one of 100 he has to do in the next hour, he wishes me a 'good career fit here' before offering his direct number for any further questions.
Um, Yah Ya'll, I got ANOTHER call for an interview!!!!

Here is my Fa-vor-ite part. This all happened at 9:15am. I wipe the shit is finally starting to happen for me grin off my face and buzz back into the building. As I fumble with turning down the ring on the phone without smearing my interviewers name, I look up and see Little Miss Manager coming toward me. I'm not at my desk at quarter after the bell and she isn't in a very good mood (3 peice suit spells disasterous day).
She almost gets a fake smile out with her "hey, hows it goin?"
I speedily reply "pretty good, but I can't get my phone to stop ringing!"
"Well, things could be worse I guess, right? hehehe"
"You're right - I don't mind getting calls =)"

HA haha HA, Little Miss... you just keep not telling me if I have a job here in two weeks... just keep on not giving me any clue as to if I can pay rent next month... go on, I dare ya to string me along... I'm double your size and could toss you're waify little size 0 fake titty'd smirk across this hallway before not telling you what on my desk goes where in the files and just leave you're insincere smile and joke of a managerial style up a creek full of HS dropout temps.

Actually, I'm in a good mood and my soul is smiling today... but it sure is fun to know I have a very real possibility of not having to hope for more of this as my best option in life!!

Quick thought... is it possible to maintain healthy eating habits while having vacationers with FAT cash purses escort you to Disneyland? Can a peice of German Chocolate cake the size of your head eaten a few days before serve as a gentle reminder of how NOT to enjoy a meal? Just thinkin...

3 comments:

curmudgeon said...

Oooooohhhhh! Most cool on the second possibility. The first sounds a little, well, huh?

Miss Sassy said...

Curmudgeon - yeah, I was thinking I screwed up copying the phone number but come ON. Ask for an interview on a voice mail at 4:45pm with no street address or time for me to accept or decline?
Maybe, no.
I like the second one too!! I have an email buddy who got me thinking financial planner - I think because that is what they do and think I could do it well, but whatever - and since I now know the power of a balance checkbook and interest accrewing savings account, I MIGHT just have a gumption to do well... with BASE PLUS COMMISION.
Did I mention I have a frequently commented on brilliant smile and know how to work a padded bra????
Yeah, I'm excited!!

slobber said...

good luck!