Tuesday, October 31, 2006

The Time Change

Seriously, I NEED to find a way to get the fuck out of bed and off to work for an 8am shift.
There has GOT to be a way to convince myself that MY goals matter.
Something has to be exciting enough for me to get out of bed and out of they house at quarter to 8am.
I laid the running shoes next to the alarm clock, to remind me that my body HATES not being active and the walk at meander speed with the dog does NOT count.
I put a post-it over the clock so I couldn't see that I could sleep in, hoping that whenever I rolled over I'd just hop to and get going.
I left the window over the bed open in the chilly fog filled beachy night evening so I could hear the rustling of Spaz and Brut and KNOW I had at least an hour to do my thing, uninterupted, before they came home.

Yet somehow there is NO WAY my ass is rolling out of bed before the absolute last second possible. I'm not back to putting my makeup on in the car yet, but the lipstick waits for the driveway and I have to pick hairstyles that disguise that my hair is still wet when I get to my desk.

My coworkers are no help on this front. "Whatever works best for you, if you want to come in at 9:30 and take a 1/2 hr lunch, thats fine too!"

Its up to me. It needs to be an internal motivation situation. Trouble is, I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON. I've tried. I can be places at 5am no problem, but a regular 9am job does NOT get me goin.
Mantras, affirmations, slingshot rigged pillows, military trumpeteers... any of you're input is desperatly requested.
Worst case scenario, I will become accustomed to being howled at for 15 minutes every morning, never eating breakfast, being given a chore list through a closed bathroom door, and getting walked in on in the shower and politely being rushed out.
I'm already borderline FUCKING BITCH AT ALL TIMES, with a bit of fanatical nutjob on the side, and my emotional callus is about 10" thick about now... if we could work on keeping the Sass online and keep the "isn't she sweet" persona in real life, I'm sure it will be a wise career move. That, or I get to throw bitch fits every morning and every night until Spaz says she wants to move out again and I can get a roomie who will stick to a fucking schedule.
Oooohhhhh... maybe I'll rig HER room with military trumpeteers blarring... blame it on the neighbor on her side of the house... say I don't hear a thing... I could have a new roomie for December 1st!!!!

Either way, tell me what you've got, I'm ready to try anything.


curmudgeon said...

I used to put an alarm clock waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay aross the room. I couldn't just roll over and hit snooze. I had to get the fuck outta the bed to shut it off.

Miss Sassy said...

C - don't you think I've tried that???
I've come out of the SHOWER and passed back out, just cuz I had an extra 20 minutes to kill...
Really gonna need something to keep me out of bed once I'm upright, though the tootsies on the carpet is a good start =)

Mom of Three said...

Nothing ever worked for me but fear. Fear of losing the job. But ask my former boss at the paper, I fuckin' NEVER, EVER came in more than 1/2 overdue. EVER.

I just got a job where they valued me more than my totally screwed up sense of time.

I am still a night person to the extent that my children stay up with me until midnight and we all get up at the crack of 10.

vincentblackshadow said...

I have 2 alarms and a stereo all rigged to go of at 10 min intervals cos my arse does not want to see 7.30am,

I'm not programmed for it either hence the 3 alarms.

But its worth it being the only one who can stay up partying when everyone else has flaked out, qulaity

Miss Sassy said...

MOT - thats usually what I go with... thats how I keep on the 9am thing. Of course I get chewed if its 9:01... but apparently as long as I tell them when I will be in and stick to it, I'm golden. But NO ONE will MAKE me be here at 8am, I've asked repeatedly.

VBS - hiya!! I've slept through my cell phone set to two alarms with different tones AND the buzz on the traditional clock... I'm right there with ya about livin it up at night though!! Even last night I was up til 12:30 for no reason at all except I was doin stuff and not tired yet... the curse of the night owl prevails!

vincentblackshadow said...

See thats why its easier to get up at 5am, cos if life was perfect we'd still be partying, getting up for 8am should be classed as cruel and unusual punishment.

Breakfast is over-rated anyway and bitch fits can be thrown at roomies at any time. Start advertising for a new one right now

Miss Sassy said...

VBS - I totally agree... if I were doing anything besides dishes or unpacking til midnight, I'd be a happy camper! Oh, wait, sometimes I have birthday suite costume parties that don't start til 1am... those last til 3 or 4... somehow I wake up just fine after those nights!!

as for the roomie - I've already got someone lined up for the day she leaves, and a backup for that person if they flake. She transfers her frustrations through Management Training talk or the Brut dog, makes it kinda hard to say "did you find a place with a pasture for a backyard yet?" when she is babytalking the dog or waving her arms as if conducting a sermon. But I'm working on it ;)

As always... Rachael said...

Nothing works for me either. If I don't have to get out of bed, I'm not gonna. Drink a ton of water before bed, you'll either wake early,or wake up wet and pissed off. Either way, you're likely to leave the bed.

Miss Sassy said...

Rachel - I hear that!! If its not the MINUTE I have to be up, I'll jump back on the bed to pet the dog, then scratch her, then roll over with her, then pass right back out...
Funny enough, I was up til 2:30am last night and had no trouble waking up EARLY for my EARLY alarm... something about a healthy sex life that keeps the day hum'n right along...