Friday, December 16, 2005

TGI F*ck It All

THIS would have been a better start to my work day.
I would much have prefered THIS to the f*cktarded things I've had to do in the last 3 hours. And there are no signs of it getting any better. Unless I come back from lunch to THIS. My day would be made if this were all I had to deal with. I'd put them all back into perfectly useable cube's of notepaper. It would take me the rest of the day, I promise.

Thank the full moon I put Limp Bizkit on the iPod-wanna-be this week.
Break Stuff is today's soundtrack.
"Your best bet is to stay away Mother F*CKER!!! Its just one of those days"
"I feel like Shit. My suggestion is to keep your distance, because Right Now I'm Dangerous"
"If my day keeps going this way I just might Break your F*ckin Face Tonight"
Its the remixed version, so the words repeat like 12 times in the song. Each time its played.

PMS. Lovely TGIF. I'm not even horny.
What usually keeps me from homicide is that I can't get my hand out of my pants long enough to get the bebe gun from the back of the cabinet.
Email me if you have extra tranquilizers, I'll give you an address to FedEx them to.
Or a sex toy I can break in. Nothing like a quicky to get all the happy neurotransmitters flowing.

I'm gonna go home and find some tequila I can shoot until you send reinforcements.
You think I'm kidding.
I am quite apparently not in the mood for wit today.
See you on the flip side.

EDIT: Confession
I left for lunch and in the car I heard that song by Pink about the guy not being like the other pills and how she can't stay on his morphine because it makes her itch...

I am still in the throws of asshat coworkers causing me to self inflict a bald spot and an eye twitch, but I called Him to see if I could weasel some free car repair from Him. It worked so well I think we decided on New Years plans. And I think somewhere in our conversation he decided to ditch his Saturday day date to expidite time under my hood. Yep, pun intended. His idea.

I am left in a much more jovial mood this afternoon.
I didn't seek out tequila at lunch because I called Him first and that was intoxication enough.
I didn't even eat at lunch. Just barely scarfing two hours later.
There is a hint of a possibility of a smile today.
Even after Pisser's holiday song list, I am fixated on the following holiday weekend.
I even made the call to ditch Dud of the Weekend Drive to spend tomorrow with Him and get my fluids checked.
Yeah. Hello, my name is Sassy and I'm an addict.
He's got a way of sparking my butterflies into formation like no one else and I crave it. I admit it. I'm not quite fine with it right now, but right this minute I am pleasantly drunk on the thought of him and THAT is what will keep me employed today - plus He doesn't show up on a piss test. Not all bad, right?

1 comment:

J said...

Those pics are hilarious!