Suck

I know, there is no actual excuse to use my blog just to keep a blogroll handy.
I've had a birthday, a cross country trip, an actual vacation complete with calling out sick the day I was set to go back to the office, I've had guys give me their business cards to call them, I've lost touch with a handful of "friends", I've had a nervous breakdown and am currently avoiding finding local doctors to update my blog... I've put on 10 lbs since the last entry, had a meeting with my manager begin with "you don't seem happy here", confirmed that there is no where else to go and I got rocked royally hard on this deal that was supposed to further my career, I've made friends with the bartender too far for the rest of my coworkers to find on a lunchbreak, and the bodega clerks on my way home. I've commited to spend a rent's worth of money to go on another vacation and when the party I was to meet canceled on me due to a suicide in the family, I tried retail therapy, which was exciting while the card swiped but a short 2 hours later I was ready to go home and crawl into bed instead of go pick it up (I felt kinda better seeing my nwe furniture purchase this morning, all lined up where I usually put the trash to take out, but not OH NOW I'M BETTER better). My Netflix only come once a week even with the upgrade because my mail carrier still won't take them back for me, and when I bring them to work I forget them in my desk for 2 days, so I'm bored kinda all the time, to the point the farmer's market guy let me know the labels have his cell number on them and I can call him for recipes anytime - you'd think it was an invitation to chat, but no.

Anyway, I've been busy hating my existance and trying to cope in ways I know are detrimental to the overall progress of my life, but it's bugging me to see blogger remind me that I used to derive a sense of joy from posting and I haven't updated in over a month (to my credit I didn't sit at a computer but once for 2 full weeks of October, and even that one wouldn't let me on the site, but still). So, here's a post, to track the decline of all things satisfactory and add to the doldrom whining of the blog world. Maybe if I get laid I'll cheer up? Didn't work last week, but I'm told next time we can try something new...