Thursday, July 12, 2007

The Softer Side of Sassy

Today's Quote

We know nothing of tomorrow, our business is to be good and happy today.
-Sydney Smith

I get these in my email, I kinda like them for the perspective they tend to lend.
In a chat with Curmudgeon, I realized that right this minute, I am not bitching, and decided that was document worthy!

Work is work, but the pressure to double the weekly goal that I acheived as a sole effort on TUESDAY is totally self imposed, the sun is shining and I've got the windows open so I'm feeling a bit more alive with the natural light pouring in (plus I can see the ocean from my office, so while the phone rings I spin around in my chair and stare at the deep blue sea, waiting for the afternoon white caps to start appearing any moment now), the cat was normal and polite this morning so I didn't start the day with profanity labels, and my body is in a delightful state of worked out and nourished without being sore or starved that has an obvious benifit on my personality. Can one really live on nutritional suppliments and fresh fruit alone, forever?? Cuz I kinda like not worrying whats for lunch these days...
Speaking of, I'm off to enjoy the sunshine, have a smile today, or borrow mine, I've got plenty!

Wednesday, July 11, 2007


Waking up 45 minutes late because Sister has spent the last few nights at Double Dip's and I am accustomed to waking up to a rukkus.
Well, Shit.
OK though, I've developed a new hair style that REQUIRES that I neither brush nor dry my hair before leaving the house, and I've got the War Paint (read: face of makeup) down to a 5 minute science and I've been wearing the same outfits to work for longer than I care to admit (read: YEARS, all new clothes are Saturday wear).

So, I'm a little sore from the cat sleeping on me and my back wearing an extra 10 pounds through the night but I am getting out of the house with 10 minutes to get 7 minutes up the street and I eek a little when I bend over to grab my shoes and wonder what hell-atious dump the cat took that the multiple cat box and litter to herself can't mask even a bit of the stench and I look up to the cream microfiber chair I was going to sit in to put my shoes on and its covered in shit.
Covered. In Shit.
So I turn to find the cat and repremand her for, you know, having a regular BM, and find that she was so upset at her behavior that she puked ALL OVER the living room.
All. Over.

So, yeah, morning didn't start well.

I roll into work with a swirl of leaves in the wake of my path (literally, actually, not blow'n smoke at ya this time) and in the elevator turn my phone to vibrate to find a text from Front Desk saying "I'm coming in maybe an hour late, can you turn the phones on?" with one of those obnoxious signature lines with smiles and decorations all over it.

Oh, and I started a diet plan Monday to reset my metabolism and break the sugar roller coaster I spend my days on, so on top of all that, I'm hungry.
Really, really hungry.
No shakes or headaches, but my stomach is bored and tells me about it.
Minute by minute updates, especially in the morning.
So, I'm a bit sore from the gym, resetting my metabolism, aching for a lude to let me fall off the wall I'm climbing, frustrated that I woke up thinking "I am going to double the weekly goal this week, and I'm going to get at least 50% credit on every order, so that means my vacation in October won't rape my checkbook the way I thought..." and I'm now here, looking around for my manager, wondering "who the fuck signed me up for this shit??"
I guess I did.
Well, Shit.

Monday, July 09, 2007


my phone is broken.

it worked fine this morning, alarm clock going, still had my unchecked voicemail indicator on, let me know what time it was when I left the house... I pulled in the work parking lot and turned the ringer to vibrate and put it back in my purse where it sits every day.

at lunch, I pulled it out to see if I could find out if my partner plans to return to her post only to find it dead.

"well, this is new. usually if it presses a button I show that I'm trying to dial ####00000###00#0##00#0#"

I try the usual tricks, take out the battery, blow off the sim card... resign to standing in line at the local shop where they have no way to test what is wrong and the best affirmation I could get was "electical devices, you never know, but if you want to see the upgraded model over here..."

apparently a 2 year contract comes with absolutely no expectation that the phone might hold out as long as the bills do.

so here I sit, hopeful that somewhere I can find a way to check voicemails and text messages without my trusty sidekick to guide me.
and in the car is my gym bag, to accompany the new healthy lifestyle complete with a full regime of fiber shakes and protein bars and whatever fruit I want to fill out my regular eating schedule... and no iTunes phone to join me on the cruisade toward baggy clothing.

The clencher... Double Dip was over last night and asked me for the umpteenth time "have you ever had any trouble with this phone? I had to switch this one out like 6 times before I gave up and paid for a new phone..."
Damn Murphy's Law and my reply of "nope, never, you ask me that every time..." and I didn't knock on wood.

Friday, July 06, 2007

Vacation Blows

I've said it before.
My family pisses me off.
I know I said I wouldn't go back, so I was asking for it by adding the home town to the trip.
It was for the grandparents though, and that part went well, and the visit to the cemetary was a highlight, I didn't realize it had been 4.5 years since my mom died until I put my hand on the gravestone.
And the local fruit and veggie chips, that almost made it worth my car falling apart while I'm driving down the highway.
But add on top of the 1300 miles in 4 days "vacation" complete with forgetting the toothbrush and frizzy hair and moving the painters tarp off the bed to go to sleep and watching my 48 year old father not be able to stay awake at 3pm while his 2 daughters sit in front of him at his work that the work place has been nothing but adrenaline inducing crises and clean ups and wondering what actually DID get done while I was away for the 15 work hours I wasn't here. To be thrown to the wolves while both my immediate managers bailed for the majority of the morning yesterday and leave me with no one to ask "huh??" to, on top of the post holiday rush, on top of the rage I was trying to quell from the "vacation"...
Lets put it this way, I've chosen a new hair style based on what I can put together without a blowdryer, brush, comb, or hairspray. Luckily, my coworkers love the funky half wavy tossed up with chopsticks look just as much as my morning schedule hates the 7 minutes it was taking me to actually DO my hair... and the headaches are noticeably subdued without the yank and pull of an actual ponytail or bun.
Its all about the silver lining here folks, stay with me.
So, today, I reconnected as a person with my front desk chick, took 7 orders from companies before 10am, fired 3 people, got 3 people interviews, had a month long fight with red tape give way... been a good productive day, I think I'll have some of the chocolate birthday cake that will be thrown out at the end of the day to celebrate my ability to be an absolute nightmare of complaints and whining and jealousy and anger and indeciciveness at home and a delightful competent coherent and totally professional workaholic at the office!!
Oh, and next week I start the Restart diet with the low glycemic shakes and prefab protein bars and water as the only liquid and all that to see if I can look at my clothes with buttons without cringing anytime before, say, the next shorts-and-tank holiday (or my birthday that I expect to spend between some sheets in Wales)... just as a heads up, its meant to kinda detox and refresh my starting point but in the mean time there may be a bit of extra crankiness.
The beer and wine and vodka hasn't been cheering me up, I figure I can't get much worse than the daily hangover even if I am starving and/or withering away.
Updates as soon as I get 2 more minutes to myself...